I am 22 today. I have seen twenty-two years of LiFe. I have gained twenty-two years worth of experiences. Twenty-two years filled with ups and downs, highs and lows, victories and failures, laughter and tears, and all else in between.
There are a couple of things that I thought I would've achieved by now. A couple of things that I thought would be a little less cloudy. But I try not to think too much about it at the moment. Afterall, 22 is still very young and I still have a lot of years ahead of me. So what the hell. Haha.
I am 22 today. Twenty-two candles were blown. Twenty-two wishes were made. I am now a year older. Hopefully a year wiser. But that is yet to be seen. Hehehe. ;)
Thank you for all your well wishes, birthday greetings, and birthday presents. They are very much appreciated. I really had a blast in the office. Thank you very much for making me feel extra special. Ahihihi. The "family" celebration wasn't the same as before, though. But I'd rather not talk about that.
Oh well. This may not be the best birthday ever. But I'm smiling anyway.
Thank you all!!! ^_^
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Wall In Love
There were no breathtaking views. No cool, clean air to greet us at the peak. There was no mountain to begin with. There was nothing. Nothing but a wall.
Supposedly, we were to meet 10am at Starbucks. I woke up a little past 9. Texted MJ that I would be late and that I'd just follow them there. In my rush to leave, I forgot to pack a pair of socks so I had to drop by SM Hypermarket first. I arrived at Starbucks a few minutes before 11. Nyaha.
The last time we went wall climbing, I told myself that next time, I'll no longer climb the straight wall and that I'll reserve all my energy climbing the inclined wall. But kuya insisted otherwise coz he had to teach Tin and Claire proper belaying. After resting for a long while and snapping a lot of photos, I once again attempted to climb the inclined wall. Sadly, I still failed to reach its peak. But I take pride at the fact that I reached approximately twice as high as my last attempt. Haha!
Come lunch time, we all agreed to get some takeout food from Taste Asia in Hypermarket. But Tin and I forgot all about it the moment we saw all these sizzling dishes. So while MJ got herself some takeout food, we absentmindedly ordered ourselves some spareribs and sisig - both served sizzlingly hot. Nyaha. Sorry, MJ! Our bad. Nweiz, I almost lost my wallet also. But thank God there are still some honest people left in this world. ^_^
When we got back, there were more people in the area - mostly Koreans and Pinoy kids. Almost all of them, especially the kids, reached the peak of the inclined wall with no sweat. Shame on me. Nyaha. So before they could crush the little spirit I had left (hehe), I firmly strapped myself into the harness and began my final ascend. On the straight wall, that is. Nyaha.
\m/(-_-)\m/
CLIMB ON!!!
Supposedly, we were to meet 10am at Starbucks. I woke up a little past 9. Texted MJ that I would be late and that I'd just follow them there. In my rush to leave, I forgot to pack a pair of socks so I had to drop by SM Hypermarket first. I arrived at Starbucks a few minutes before 11. Nyaha.
The last time we went wall climbing, I told myself that next time, I'll no longer climb the straight wall and that I'll reserve all my energy climbing the inclined wall. But kuya insisted otherwise coz he had to teach Tin and Claire proper belaying. After resting for a long while and snapping a lot of photos, I once again attempted to climb the inclined wall. Sadly, I still failed to reach its peak. But I take pride at the fact that I reached approximately twice as high as my last attempt. Haha!
Come lunch time, we all agreed to get some takeout food from Taste Asia in Hypermarket. But Tin and I forgot all about it the moment we saw all these sizzling dishes. So while MJ got herself some takeout food, we absentmindedly ordered ourselves some spareribs and sisig - both served sizzlingly hot. Nyaha. Sorry, MJ! Our bad. Nweiz, I almost lost my wallet also. But thank God there are still some honest people left in this world. ^_^
When we got back, there were more people in the area - mostly Koreans and Pinoy kids. Almost all of them, especially the kids, reached the peak of the inclined wall with no sweat. Shame on me. Nyaha. So before they could crush the little spirit I had left (hehe), I firmly strapped myself into the harness and began my final ascend. On the straight wall, that is. Nyaha.
\m/(-_-)\m/
CLIMB ON!!!
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Stuck In Reverse
We had a meeting a while ago, which I thought was just about our tasks and our much anticipated Baguio trip. Sure, we had those things settled but little did I know that neither was the meat of the meeting.
Not a week has passed since Ate Lotis left for Singapore. Now, Ate Rochelle announced that she would be tendering her resignation either tomorrow or on Monday. I was utterly taken aback by the onrush of events. Sure, I knew that this day would eventually come. But I really didn't expect it to be this soon. To say that the news made me sad is to put it mildly. Coz if truth be told, I am waaay beyond sad. Ugh! I dunno. First it was Tin and then Ate Lotis and now it's Ate Rochelle. Who's next? T_T
*Sigh* I will surely miss their company, the shared laughters, the kulitans, the playful arguments, the stories, the friday night gimmicks... I'll miss all of it. I'll miss all of them.
But just like what Ate Rochelle said, the friendship will not end the moment she steps out of the office (for good). Since she will not be leaving for another country, we could still carry on with the weekly nights of dining out. That is if our work schedules would allow it. Either way, I do hope that the ties that we've built as a team will not be made loose by the miles and miles of space between us. And I hope that I'm not just hoping against hope.
I just realized that for me, Tsukiden has become the wonderful workplace that it is not so much because of the work that I do, but mostly because of the wonderful people whom I work with, the people whom I spend 8 hours or more of my day with. And now that these people are slowly thinning out, I'm no longer quite sure if it's still worth staying. Scary thought.
Not a week has passed since Ate Lotis left for Singapore. Now, Ate Rochelle announced that she would be tendering her resignation either tomorrow or on Monday. I was utterly taken aback by the onrush of events. Sure, I knew that this day would eventually come. But I really didn't expect it to be this soon. To say that the news made me sad is to put it mildly. Coz if truth be told, I am waaay beyond sad. Ugh! I dunno. First it was Tin and then Ate Lotis and now it's Ate Rochelle. Who's next? T_T
*Sigh* I will surely miss their company, the shared laughters, the kulitans, the playful arguments, the stories, the friday night gimmicks... I'll miss all of it. I'll miss all of them.
But just like what Ate Rochelle said, the friendship will not end the moment she steps out of the office (for good). Since she will not be leaving for another country, we could still carry on with the weekly nights of dining out. That is if our work schedules would allow it. Either way, I do hope that the ties that we've built as a team will not be made loose by the miles and miles of space between us. And I hope that I'm not just hoping against hope.
I just realized that for me, Tsukiden has become the wonderful workplace that it is not so much because of the work that I do, but mostly because of the wonderful people whom I work with, the people whom I spend 8 hours or more of my day with. And now that these people are slowly thinning out, I'm no longer quite sure if it's still worth staying. Scary thought.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
On To Greener Pastures
In a short span of less than a month, four of my project mates have left the company for a better deal - a better life, even. Two of them came from our team.
:: Tin Concha. Even before Tin became a VGS member, I already had the chance to work with her back in our NGN days. We were even teammates then. But not for long coz I was transferred to VGS a month later. Needless to say, we didn't become good friends at that time. Not until she was transferred to our project and became my seatmate. Since then, she became a friend and a confidante to me. She's one of the few persons in the office whom I can openly talk to about anything without fear of prodding a raised eyebrow or a leering smile. She helped me come out of my whirlpool of negative and twisted thoughts, which pulls me down from time to time. She bore with me even at times when I'm being complacently foolish. Or at least she tried to. Hehe. She trusted me with her stories. And so did I.
:: Lotis Lira. They say that first impression lasts. But with Ate Lotis, I beg to disagree. When I first joined VGS, I really thought that she was the snobbish and cranky type of person. Uhm... Well... Ok, she can get a bit cranky at times but it's not something that I can't put up with. Funny thing is that she also thought that I was snobbish and cranky. When in fact I was just being my *ehem* usual shy self. Hehe. She was my immediate superior then and I really found it difficult, if not impossible, to approach her. I kinda felt like there was this unspoken tension between us. I dunno. Nweiz, whatever it was, I'm just sooo glad it died down and was eventually replaced not just with barrels of laughter and good times, but with friendship.
An awful lot of people have resigned before them. I've heard a lot of them say their goodbyes and I've seen them walk out the doors of Tsukiden. But when Tin and Ate Lotis left, not only did I see them leave, but I also felt them leave. Maybe because I got used to having them around and I got myself attached in a way. Too attached, actually. Haiii, nakakamiss. T_T
Franz: "Di ka kasi dapat maging attached sa mga ka-team mo..."
Point taken. Oh well. As Ate Rochelle put it, "It happens". We all got left and we're all gonna leave this company at one time or another. And someday, it'll be my turn...
:: Tin Concha. Even before Tin became a VGS member, I already had the chance to work with her back in our NGN days. We were even teammates then. But not for long coz I was transferred to VGS a month later. Needless to say, we didn't become good friends at that time. Not until she was transferred to our project and became my seatmate. Since then, she became a friend and a confidante to me. She's one of the few persons in the office whom I can openly talk to about anything without fear of prodding a raised eyebrow or a leering smile. She helped me come out of my whirlpool of negative and twisted thoughts, which pulls me down from time to time. She bore with me even at times when I'm being complacently foolish. Or at least she tried to. Hehe. She trusted me with her stories. And so did I.
:: Lotis Lira. They say that first impression lasts. But with Ate Lotis, I beg to disagree. When I first joined VGS, I really thought that she was the snobbish and cranky type of person. Uhm... Well... Ok, she can get a bit cranky at times but it's not something that I can't put up with. Funny thing is that she also thought that I was snobbish and cranky. When in fact I was just being my *ehem* usual shy self. Hehe. She was my immediate superior then and I really found it difficult, if not impossible, to approach her. I kinda felt like there was this unspoken tension between us. I dunno. Nweiz, whatever it was, I'm just sooo glad it died down and was eventually replaced not just with barrels of laughter and good times, but with friendship.
An awful lot of people have resigned before them. I've heard a lot of them say their goodbyes and I've seen them walk out the doors of Tsukiden. But when Tin and Ate Lotis left, not only did I see them leave, but I also felt them leave. Maybe because I got used to having them around and I got myself attached in a way. Too attached, actually. Haiii, nakakamiss. T_T
Franz: "Di ka kasi dapat maging attached sa mga ka-team mo..."
Point taken. Oh well. As Ate Rochelle put it, "It happens". We all got left and we're all gonna leave this company at one time or another. And someday, it'll be my turn...
Thursday, September 20, 2007
The Great Wall
Boss Chris: "Averse personality yan si Kringle e..."
Well I put up a wall for a myriad of reasons. Mainly for protection - from other people, from my weaknesses and vulnerabilities, and from the cruelties of this world. But what they fail to realize is that the wall is not always there to keep people out. Sometimes, I just wanna know who cares enough to knock it down.
Well I put up a wall for a myriad of reasons. Mainly for protection - from other people, from my weaknesses and vulnerabilities, and from the cruelties of this world. But what they fail to realize is that the wall is not always there to keep people out. Sometimes, I just wanna know who cares enough to knock it down.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Under My Skin
I thought 'twas going to be a kick-ass night. Well, it was. Coz you kicked my ass. Even my face.
Being such a tease myself, I know how to take a sarcastic jab, let alone an effin' joke. They don't get to permeate my skin that easily. I don't allow them to. But it gets hard once personal issues come into play.
Franz: "Wag mo na lang pansinin yun..."
That's easy for you to say. But I can't. Try as I might, I can't. Her words were packed with a great deal of meaning and were indefatigably thrown at me like daggers. If words could kill, I would've been killed, buried, dug-up, and then killed again.
I cried not because I was hurt. I was, though, but seldom do I shed tears of pain. I cried because I was pissed off. And mind you, it was the last thing I wanted to feel. Especially now. I could've lashed out. I could've fought back. But I didn't. I didn't want to. So I cried... because there's no other way to let it out.
Being such a tease myself, I know how to take a sarcastic jab, let alone an effin' joke. They don't get to permeate my skin that easily. I don't allow them to. But it gets hard once personal issues come into play.
Franz: "Wag mo na lang pansinin yun..."
That's easy for you to say. But I can't. Try as I might, I can't. Her words were packed with a great deal of meaning and were indefatigably thrown at me like daggers. If words could kill, I would've been killed, buried, dug-up, and then killed again.
I cried not because I was hurt. I was, though, but seldom do I shed tears of pain. I cried because I was pissed off. And mind you, it was the last thing I wanted to feel. Especially now. I could've lashed out. I could've fought back. But I didn't. I didn't want to. So I cried... because there's no other way to let it out.
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Tanjoubi Omedetou!
For three years now, I've been putting portions of my life out for public consumption. I've been writing, ranting, and raving about nothing and everything. Three years of self-expression and self-examination. Three years... and counting still.
With nothing more to say (or write, for that matter), picked out my top three blog entries. Why? Just because. Hehe. I thought of writing a short background about each, the reason why I wrote it and to whom it was addressed, but the words failed to escape me. So just read on if you want to. ^_^
1. Rain On Me (January 2005)
2. Shouldn't Couldn't Wouldn't (April 2006)
3. Silver Toes (June 2006)
Here's to many more wonderful years of blogging to come! ^_^
Saturday, August 04, 2007
Keep It Mean And Green
Peeled myself off my bed at around *ehem* 5:30 in the morning. Hehe. Texted Boss Joseph about who would help him carry the cooler.
Boss Joseph: "Wow. You're early..."
Well, you can say that again. Hehe. Met up with Roxie and Boss Chris at 7-11. We arrived at the Meralco Gym a quarter before nine. As usual, there were but a few people already there. Even the Admin was nowhere in sight. Ha! Needless to say, the event started behind schedule.... again. Nyaha.
The invocation was given by JP followed by the Oath of Sportsmanship led by Ate Rochelle. Anton led us through a series of stretching exercises to flex our untapped muscles and awaken our sleepy bones.
Apparently, we preferred to stretch our facial muscles instead. Hehehe.
The games followed immediately after. Found myself in the women's basketball game and in the team relay. Thank goodness the basketball game wasn't as "physical" as last year's game. There were no sprained ankles, ugly bumps, colorful bruises, cat-claw scratches, dead toenails, or whatnot. Well, at least for our team. Hehe. Also, I was able to shoot most of my shots this time. I guess that's what happens when one plays under pressure. Nyaha.
A week or two before the game:
Ate Lotis: "Basta ipapasa ko sayo yung bola tapos i-shoot mo."
Me: "E pano kapag di ko na-shoot?"
Ate Lotis: "Susuntukin kita."
Me: "Nyaaah."
During the game:
Ate Lotis: "Kringle!!! I-shoot mo!!!"
Now when your boss commands you with more than just might, who are you to err?! Buti na lang nanalo kami or else I would've gotten myself a sweet punch in the gut. Nyaha. Nweiz, here are the game results:
::Basketball::
Men's - 1st place
Women's - 1st place
::Badminton::
Men's Doubles - 1st place
Women's Doubles - 2nd place
Mixed Doubles - 3rd place
::Arm Wrestling::
Male - 3rd place
Female - 2nd place
100-m dash - 4th place
50-m dash - 2nd place
Team Relay- 3rd place
Dodge Ball - 4th place
We may not have brought home the bacon for more than half of the games but still, kudos to all the players for putting up a good fight!
After the sportsfest was the Family day where the employees' kids played some parlor games. Though we are all a bunch of kids at heart, playing with papers and straws just doesn't tickle our fancies. So, what does? Hmm...
Boss Joseph: "Wow. You're early..."
Well, you can say that again. Hehe. Met up with Roxie and Boss Chris at 7-11. We arrived at the Meralco Gym a quarter before nine. As usual, there were but a few people already there. Even the Admin was nowhere in sight. Ha! Needless to say, the event started behind schedule.... again. Nyaha.
The invocation was given by JP followed by the Oath of Sportsmanship led by Ate Rochelle. Anton led us through a series of stretching exercises to flex our untapped muscles and awaken our sleepy bones.
Apparently, we preferred to stretch our facial muscles instead. Hehehe.
The games followed immediately after. Found myself in the women's basketball game and in the team relay. Thank goodness the basketball game wasn't as "physical" as last year's game. There were no sprained ankles, ugly bumps, colorful bruises, cat-claw scratches, dead toenails, or whatnot. Well, at least for our team. Hehe. Also, I was able to shoot most of my shots this time. I guess that's what happens when one plays under pressure. Nyaha.
A week or two before the game:
Ate Lotis: "Basta ipapasa ko sayo yung bola tapos i-shoot mo."
Me: "E pano kapag di ko na-shoot?"
Ate Lotis: "Susuntukin kita."
Me: "Nyaaah."
During the game:
Ate Lotis: "Kringle!!! I-shoot mo!!!"
Now when your boss commands you with more than just might, who are you to err?! Buti na lang nanalo kami or else I would've gotten myself a sweet punch in the gut. Nyaha. Nweiz, here are the game results:
::Basketball::
Men's - 1st place
Women's - 1st place
::Badminton::
Men's Doubles - 1st place
Women's Doubles - 2nd place
Mixed Doubles - 3rd place
::Arm Wrestling::
Male - 3rd place
Female - 2nd place
100-m dash - 4th place
50-m dash - 2nd place
Team Relay- 3rd place
Dodge Ball - 4th place
We may not have brought home the bacon for more than half of the games but still, kudos to all the players for putting up a good fight!
After the sportsfest was the Family day where the employees' kids played some parlor games. Though we are all a bunch of kids at heart, playing with papers and straws just doesn't tickle our fancies. So, what does? Hmm...
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Simpsonized
"Spider Pig, Spider Pig. Does whatever a Spider Pig does. Can he swing from a web? No, he can't. He's a pig. Look ooouuut! He is Spider Pig!"
Watched The Simpsons Movie with Roxie and April. While it seemed like an extended version of a half-hour TV episode, 'twas everything I expected from the Springfield folks, and more! There were so many scenes that had me laughing silly. My favorite character, Ralph Wiggum, didn't get much exposure, though. But he was able to deliver one of the funniest lines in the movie. He was like, "I like men now" after seeing Bart's little doodle. Nyahaha. This has to be the best Simpsons movie... SO FAR! Hehe. Can't wait for the sequel! D'OH!
I already have a SouthPark version of me and now here goes a Simpsonized me:
Simpsonize yourself here.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Sweet Revenge
Just last year, we were the ones at the stage, exposing ouselves to ridicule and humiliation. But now, 'twas our turn to sit back, relax, and enjoy an animé-themed show.
The first group did a PBB-like presentation. Jonathan and Felix were quite revealing and daring in their dance showdown. Good thing I was already done with my dinner. Hehe. Can't quite remember where the story revolved or if there was a story at all. Though they did a pretty good job portraying Master Pogi and Astroboy. ^_^
The second group started their presentation with really (and I mean really, REALLY) corny jokes.
Yes, as in THAT corny. Nyaha. The punchlines were so "hard-hitting", I dunno whether I should laugh or cry! It is worth mentioning though that their Prince of Tennis stunt was very creatively done. I really enjoyed watching them make a fool outta themselves. Nyaha. ^_^
Mr. Saito and Mr. Watanabe did a surprise number, which wasn't really surprising coz 'twas mentioned in the emailed programme. Nyaah.
"Pinaputi ni Pepito and pitongpu't pitong puting putong patong-patong"
Mr. Watanabe won, albeit with a twisted tongue. Hehe. ^_^
The next group that performed seemed unpracticed. They just spewed a lot of nonsense for our amusement... or non-amusement. Ehe. Their presentation was more of a stand-up comedy routine, only we weren't laughing hard. And I still don't see the point of having the girls dance in silhouette. ...Or was I the only who missed the point?
The last group did the infamous Boy Bastos thing. The jokes were lame, and so was Boy Bastos. Guess he didn't eat his vegetables lately, did he? Hehe. They also had a "Da Who?" segment, which for me was waaay overboard and inappropriate to begin with. I think they are a little too insolent for a "newbie". Oh well.
Revenge never tasted this good. Hehehe. ^_^
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Separate Lives
We've all been dealing with a lot lately. Little things, big things, that slowly brought this family into shambles.
When I got home, my mom told me that we're moving to my lola's place as soon as possible. Oh-kay, thanks for the news flash. So what am I to do now? I dunno. I mean, I knew it was over. I just kept hoping that it wouldn't reach that point but it had. That they would still try to stick it through but they didn't.
Well, if they both need some time away from each other. If they think this will be for the better. If this is what they want. Then so be it.
So be it.
"If this is what he wants
And it's what she wants
Then why is there so much pain?"
--- Stay Together For The Kids, Blink 182
When I got home, my mom told me that we're moving to my lola's place as soon as possible. Oh-kay, thanks for the news flash. So what am I to do now? I dunno. I mean, I knew it was over. I just kept hoping that it wouldn't reach that point but it had. That they would still try to stick it through but they didn't.
Well, if they both need some time away from each other. If they think this will be for the better. If this is what they want. Then so be it.
So be it.
"If this is what he wants
And it's what she wants
Then why is there so much pain?"
--- Stay Together For The Kids, Blink 182
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Spare Me
The bowling tournament was once again held at the Coronado Lanes in StarMall. Since the games were not to begin yet, Roxie, Borj and I walked through the mall looking for a place to eat. We ended up eating lugaw at the food court. I wasn't able to finish my bowl coz I've poured too much fish sauce into it. Ehe. Just a thought: What's the difference between goto, lugaw and arroz caldo??? Oh well.
When we got back, the tournament was about to start. There were no practice games for me so no wonder my first ball went straight down the gutter. Nyaha. Last year, I was able to throw a strike. But this year, I wasn't able to pull one off though I had a couple of spare shots. I think I threw more gutterballs also! And I wasn't able to top my personal best of 70 points! ARGH!
We were about to go home when Blessy approached me. She told me that we were down by a single point and that we could've gone to the finals. If only. Huhu.
I suck. x_x
When we got back, the tournament was about to start. There were no practice games for me so no wonder my first ball went straight down the gutter. Nyaha. Last year, I was able to throw a strike. But this year, I wasn't able to pull one off though I had a couple of spare shots. I think I threw more gutterballs also! And I wasn't able to top my personal best of 70 points! ARGH!
We were about to go home when Blessy approached me. She told me that we were down by a single point and that we could've gone to the finals. If only. Huhu.
I suck. x_x
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Grande Island
I had last minute second thoughts about joining this huling-hirit summer getaway. My mom was diagnosed with diabetes and a cyst was found on one of her ovaries. I had to help with the medical expenses and I was practically running short of cash. But thanks to friends, my 50% down payment wasn't put to waste and I was still able to take this much needed break. ^_^
Met up with Gary at Ministop, Galleria at around 6:30am. Ercia told us not to be late. Seriously? SERIOUSLY. Well, we waited for them for an hour or two. 'Twas because of Charlie, I think. Seriously? SERIOUSLY. Hehe. Nweiz, because of the delay, we were caught up in traffic. But traffic jams are not that bad for friends who haven't seen each other in a while...
Finally arrived at the Subic Bay Freeport Zone and had a quick stop over to answer nature's call. We reached the Ferry terminal and took more pictures as we waited for the next trip. After an hour, we boarded the ferry boat going to Grande Island Resort. Lucky us, we were able to occupy a table inside where we sat comfortably for the rest of the ride.
The receiving area was kinda crowded for there were about three companies having their company outing. But we were in a grand island so what the hell. Checked out the rooms first...
Then, we had our buffet lunch. It wasn't that good, maybe because we're already late. Actually, I barely remember what I had for lunch. All I can recall is the salad. And that's just because of these pictures...
After lunch, we all retreated into our rooms to rest for a while. Roxie and I were very disgusted because the toilet was a complete mess after Arnie used it. There were McArthurs in the bowl and pee on the floor. *Barf* Oops! There goes my lunch. >_< Guys, I have one question - Is it really that difficult to aim your pee???
Nweiz, we spent the afternoon using the coupons, which were part of the package. There were a lot of choices for the Water Adventure - Banana Boat, Flying Fish, Chariot, Stingray - just to name a few. We first rode the famous Banana Boat. Then, we tried another ride called Chariot, which was a lot more thrilling. Next summer, I wish I get to do parasailing naman. Hehe.
Another coupon entitled us to play badminton and volleyball. I'm not a big volleyball fan coz whenever I play the sport, my arms get peppered with bruises. Nyaha. After the game, we stayed near the side beach to take some pictures 'til sunset.
We then had another buffet meal for our dinner. This time, the food was better. Also, there was this cultural show enjoyed by the foreigners and locals alike.
After dinner, we went night swimming in the pool. I saw three falling stars. Gary confessed something that shocked us all. Hehe. Too bad there was a curfew policy for the pool so we had no choice but to call it a night. Bleh.
Roxie and I weren't able to sleep well that night. We were bombarded with unbelievably loud snores that could put a foghorn to shame. I guess that explains why I can't seem to bring myself to smile in these pictures...
We then had our buffet breakfast. After eating, we had some sort of nature trip walking the trails and exploring the woods. For some reason, there were umpteen million dead frogs on the road. God, I miss the experience. Wah! I wanna hike again!
Went back to our rooms to prepare to leave. After we checked out, we stayed for more camera whoring. Hehe.
On our way home, we dropped by Duty Free to do a little chocolate shopping. We then stopped by the recycled house featured in Rated K. The gate was made of gas tanks of all sizes and the umbrellas were made out of scrap metals. How cool is that?
Then, we grabbed a bite to eat at Razon's. Their heavenly halo-halo never failed to tickle my taste buds. Yum! ^_^
Goodbye, Summer!
Met up with Gary at Ministop, Galleria at around 6:30am. Ercia told us not to be late. Seriously? SERIOUSLY. Well, we waited for them for an hour or two. 'Twas because of Charlie, I think. Seriously? SERIOUSLY. Hehe. Nweiz, because of the delay, we were caught up in traffic. But traffic jams are not that bad for friends who haven't seen each other in a while...
Finally arrived at the Subic Bay Freeport Zone and had a quick stop over to answer nature's call. We reached the Ferry terminal and took more pictures as we waited for the next trip. After an hour, we boarded the ferry boat going to Grande Island Resort. Lucky us, we were able to occupy a table inside where we sat comfortably for the rest of the ride.
The receiving area was kinda crowded for there were about three companies having their company outing. But we were in a grand island so what the hell. Checked out the rooms first...
Then, we had our buffet lunch. It wasn't that good, maybe because we're already late. Actually, I barely remember what I had for lunch. All I can recall is the salad. And that's just because of these pictures...
After lunch, we all retreated into our rooms to rest for a while. Roxie and I were very disgusted because the toilet was a complete mess after Arnie used it. There were McArthurs in the bowl and pee on the floor. *Barf* Oops! There goes my lunch. >_< Guys, I have one question - Is it really that difficult to aim your pee???
Nweiz, we spent the afternoon using the coupons, which were part of the package. There were a lot of choices for the Water Adventure - Banana Boat, Flying Fish, Chariot, Stingray - just to name a few. We first rode the famous Banana Boat. Then, we tried another ride called Chariot, which was a lot more thrilling. Next summer, I wish I get to do parasailing naman. Hehe.
Another coupon entitled us to play badminton and volleyball. I'm not a big volleyball fan coz whenever I play the sport, my arms get peppered with bruises. Nyaha. After the game, we stayed near the side beach to take some pictures 'til sunset.
We then had another buffet meal for our dinner. This time, the food was better. Also, there was this cultural show enjoyed by the foreigners and locals alike.
After dinner, we went night swimming in the pool. I saw three falling stars. Gary confessed something that shocked us all. Hehe. Too bad there was a curfew policy for the pool so we had no choice but to call it a night. Bleh.
Roxie and I weren't able to sleep well that night. We were bombarded with unbelievably loud snores that could put a foghorn to shame. I guess that explains why I can't seem to bring myself to smile in these pictures...
We then had our buffet breakfast. After eating, we had some sort of nature trip walking the trails and exploring the woods. For some reason, there were umpteen million dead frogs on the road. God, I miss the experience. Wah! I wanna hike again!
Went back to our rooms to prepare to leave. After we checked out, we stayed for more camera whoring. Hehe.
On our way home, we dropped by Duty Free to do a little chocolate shopping. We then stopped by the recycled house featured in Rated K. The gate was made of gas tanks of all sizes and the umbrellas were made out of scrap metals. How cool is that?
Then, we grabbed a bite to eat at Razon's. Their heavenly halo-halo never failed to tickle my taste buds. Yum! ^_^
Goodbye, Summer!
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Feel Me In
JP: "Wala naisip ko lang. Kung ganon ka ka-expressive sa blog mo, bakit in person hindi naman?"
Well, I don't talk a lot about feelings and emotions (so I am told). Sure, I speak my mind but seldom do I speak my heart. Why? Let me count the reasons.
One, I find it easier to express my emotions in writing. Coz there isn't much to worry about when I write. No need to worry about dodging questions that I don't wanna answer. No need to worry about being disappointed for not getting the response that I expect. And I need not worry about keeping people interested on what I have to say. If they don't like what I write or if they don't find me interesting, they can easily click me off their screens for all I care.
Two, there are times when I feel like plain spoken words aren't enough to convey the emotions that I hold in me. That they're not as powerful. When I share how I feel, making it known to another person ain't good enough for me. When I share how I feel, I want the other person to know the emotion, understand it, and feel its intensity (if not the emotion itself). And I think only through the use of written words can I breathe life into each faceless emotion effectively.
Three, I gain much satisfaction from expressing myself creatively through writing. I play with words like a kid playing with his brand-spankin' shiny new toy - filled with a devil-may-care joy and gusto, overflowing with so much energy and enthusiasm.
Words are my toys. And this blog is my playground.
Well, I don't talk a lot about feelings and emotions (so I am told). Sure, I speak my mind but seldom do I speak my heart. Why? Let me count the reasons.
One, I find it easier to express my emotions in writing. Coz there isn't much to worry about when I write. No need to worry about dodging questions that I don't wanna answer. No need to worry about being disappointed for not getting the response that I expect. And I need not worry about keeping people interested on what I have to say. If they don't like what I write or if they don't find me interesting, they can easily click me off their screens for all I care.
Two, there are times when I feel like plain spoken words aren't enough to convey the emotions that I hold in me. That they're not as powerful. When I share how I feel, making it known to another person ain't good enough for me. When I share how I feel, I want the other person to know the emotion, understand it, and feel its intensity (if not the emotion itself). And I think only through the use of written words can I breathe life into each faceless emotion effectively.
Three, I gain much satisfaction from expressing myself creatively through writing. I play with words like a kid playing with his brand-spankin' shiny new toy - filled with a devil-may-care joy and gusto, overflowing with so much energy and enthusiasm.
Words are my toys. And this blog is my playground.
Saturday, May 05, 2007
Vertical Thrill
Went wall climbing with Roxie, MJ, Simon, Julius, and Marlyn at Power-Up, Silver City. Gerard, one of the instructors, first taught us how to do proper belaying, climbing, and basic equipment handling. To avoid any accidents, he told us that the communication between the climber and the belayer must be clear.
Before climbing, the climber should tell the belayer that he is ready to climb,
Climber: "Climbing!"
The belayer should then confirm that he is aware of the climb and is now ready to secure the climber,
Belayer: "Climb on!"
While the climber is up against the wall, he can make any of the following calls depending on his need:
If the climber needs the security of a tighter rope,
Climber: "Tension!"
If the rope is too tight, and the climber needs the belayer to loosen it off a bit,
Climber: "Slack!"
When the climber is already on top, as the saying goes, the only way to go is down. But before he could go down the wall, he should first inform the belayer of his descend,
Climber: "Down!"
Then, the belayer should pull any remaining slack to ensure that the climber won't fall. Once done,
Belayer: "Let go!"
Apparently, all the climbing commands are straightforward and are very easy to remember. Using them would be as easy as ABC - or so we thought.
Roxie as Climber: "Climb on!"
Me as Belayer: "Climbing!"
Gerard: "Baliktad!!!"
Roxie: "Aray! Ang sakit! Ang sakit!"
Gerard: "Anong sabi mo?"
Roxie: "Slack! Slack! Slaaack!!!"
Me: "Pagod na ko! Bababa na ko..."
MJ: "Down?"
Me: "Oo, down na!"
MJ: "Let go!"
Me: "Promise?"
MJ: "Oo!"
Me: "Talaga?"
Hahaha! ^_^ After climbing the beginner's wall a couple of times, we decided to try a more challenging wall - one that was slightly angled. I clenched and clawed and laughed my way up the wall without much agility and success. I found it difficult to sustain a strong grip on the hand holds. Guess it goes to show how heavy I am. Ehe. I don't think I got higher than six feet when I slipped. Argh!
MJ climbed the angled wall with so much ease and grace. She was almost able to reach the top of the wall. Galing! No wonder Spidey fell in love with her! ;)
And what better way to end this day than to watch Spiderman 3?!
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Listen To What I'm Not Saying
Attended a Personality Development and Professional Attitude Enhancement seminar. I thought it's gonna be a boring discussion that I had to sit through for 8 hours but I was proven wrong. It turned out to be quite an interesting and cultivating experience. I got to learn more about other people and even more about myself.
Ma'am Michel taught us a template that we could use to help us win arguments. It goes:
When you said _______ I felt _______ because _______.
So I suggest _______.
Then, she asked us to come up with our own argument using the template. I came up with this:
"When you said you were scared, I felt hurt and confused. Because I was scared too but I didn't push you away. So I suggest you get your act together and let's do this together."
Now that I got to reread what I wrote, I realized that the last line sounded off and that it didn't make much sense. So here goes an improved version of it:
"When you said you were scared, I felt hurt and confused. Because I was scared too but I didn't push you away. So I suggest that you stop being so cowardly and let's fall in love together."
Better or only mushier? Hehe. ^_^
Ma'am Michel also shared one of her favorite poems entitled 'Please Listen (To What I'm Not Saying)'. We were asked to pick a line or a stanza that struck us most and if we wanted to, we could elaborate on it. I chose the lines,
"Don't be fooled by the face I wear,
For I wear a mask, I wear a thousand masks."
People see me as a happy person coz I'm always smiling and laughing. But just because I'm all smiles and laughter doesn't mean I'm always happy. Sometimes, the smile becomes pasted and the laughter, artificial. I may put up a happy disposition despite the brokenness inside. So please, don't be fooled by the face I wear...
Nweiz, there are a lot of things in my mind right now. Most of it are realizations punching me relentlessly in the face. So I'll just post them one by one before they could smash the living daylights out of me.
- I realized how our words could represent us. How the words that escape our mouths could give a wrong perception of our mind and our personality. I myself am guilty of using inappropriate language. I speak my mind without inhibitions that sometimes I offend people, though unintentionally. I never thought wrong of it, until someone misjudged me as being argumentative. Belligerent, even. I know I'm not those things and I don't wanna create that kind of impression. Well then I guess I have to take things down a notch or two. And I will.
- I realized that though I never cared about the pain I was inflicting on myself, I failed to take into consideration the pain I was inflicting on my parents. I've done/said things that I know have wounded them. Out of anger - for claiming to know what's good for me, for trying to manipulate me. Out of pain - in realizing that the house I grew up in is no longer my home, in seeing the family that I used to embrace so dearly break into a million little pieces, in losing the only thing that really mattered to me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you just because of the pain you've caused me, I know that's very immature of me. And since you've been very vocal about it, I'm also sorry for not being the kind of daughter you wish you had.
- I realized how much I've neglected You, my God. I used to talk to You like a friend in times of happiness and of sadness. We used to have a strong relationship. But then I started questioning Your existence. It became difficult for me to hold on to my blind faith when all my prayers seemed to have fallen on deaf ears. I thought I'm strong enough to coast through life without You. But I was wrong. Without You, I'm wretched, I'm lost and I'm weak. You know I was never a religious person. But I was a believer. A strong one, at that. And God, I want to believe again. Do You still have room for someone like me?
- I realized that my greatest mistake was to be constantly afraid that I will make a mistake. I have this fear of making the wrong choices that I tend to leave all my options open until none are left. I was given many chances before but I kept on screwing things up. I kept on trusting the wrong persons with my heart. I kept on putting my energy into things that never worked out. Many times, people got disappointed in the choices that I made. And every time, I felt a needling sense of failure. But life, I know, would always be full of so many choices that I would have to make. I need not worry about making the wrong choices because it's ok as it is normal. People might get disappointed again, but I'll just let them be. Choices would be made and I would readily deal with whatever the outcome might be.
And so I end this post with a beautiful poem. It's quite long but please take time to read it... ^_^
Please Listen!
(To What I'm Not Saying)
Don't be fooled by me.
Don't be fooled by the face I wear.
For I wear a mask, I wear a thousand masks.
Masks that I'm afraid to take off.
And none of them is me.
Pretending is an art that's second nature with me.
But don't be fooled, I beg you, don't be fooled.
I gave you the impression that I'm secure,
That all is sunny and unruffled with me.
Within, as well as without.
That confidence is my name,
And coolness my game.
That the water's calm and I'm in command,
And that I need no one.
But don't believe me. Please.
My surface may seem smooth,
But my surface is my mask.
Beneath lies no smugness, no complacence.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion,
In fear, in aloneness.
But I hide this.
I don't want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness,
And fear of being exposed.
That's why I frantically create a mask to hide behind.
A nonchalant, sophisticated façade.
To help me pretend,
To shield me from the glance that knows.
But such a glance is precisely my salvation,
My only salvation.
And I know it.
That is, if it's followed by acceptance.
If it's followed by love.
It's the only thing that can liberate me.
From myself,
From my own self-built prison walls,
From the barriers that I so painstakingly erect.
It's the only thing that will assure me
Of what I can't assure myself.
That I'm really worth something.
But I don't tell you this.
I don't dare.
I'm afraid to.
I'm afraid your glance will not be followed
By acceptance and love.
I'm afraid you'll think less of me.
That you'll laugh.
And your laugh will kill me
I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing,
That I'm just no good,
And that you'll see this and reject me.
So I play my game.
My desperate pretending game.
With a façade of assurance without,
And trembling child within.
And so begins the parade of masks,
And my life becomes a front.
I idly chatter to you,
In the suave tones of surface talk.
I tell you everything that's really nothing,
And nothing of what's everything,
Of what's crying within me.
So when I'm going through my routine,
Don't be fooled by what I'm saying.
Please listen carefully and try to hear
What I'm not saying,
What I'd like to be able to say,
What for survival I need to say,
But which I can't say.
I dislike hiding. Honestly.
I dislike the superficial game I'm playing.
The superficial, phony game.
I'd really like to be genuine,
And spontaneous,
And me.
But you've got to help me.
Ma'am Michel taught us a template that we could use to help us win arguments. It goes:
When you said _______ I felt _______ because _______.
So I suggest _______.
Then, she asked us to come up with our own argument using the template. I came up with this:
"When you said you were scared, I felt hurt and confused. Because I was scared too but I didn't push you away. So I suggest you get your act together and let's do this together."
Now that I got to reread what I wrote, I realized that the last line sounded off and that it didn't make much sense. So here goes an improved version of it:
"When you said you were scared, I felt hurt and confused. Because I was scared too but I didn't push you away. So I suggest that you stop being so cowardly and let's fall in love together."
Better or only mushier? Hehe. ^_^
Ma'am Michel also shared one of her favorite poems entitled 'Please Listen (To What I'm Not Saying)'. We were asked to pick a line or a stanza that struck us most and if we wanted to, we could elaborate on it. I chose the lines,
"Don't be fooled by the face I wear,
For I wear a mask, I wear a thousand masks."
People see me as a happy person coz I'm always smiling and laughing. But just because I'm all smiles and laughter doesn't mean I'm always happy. Sometimes, the smile becomes pasted and the laughter, artificial. I may put up a happy disposition despite the brokenness inside. So please, don't be fooled by the face I wear...
Nweiz, there are a lot of things in my mind right now. Most of it are realizations punching me relentlessly in the face. So I'll just post them one by one before they could smash the living daylights out of me.
- I realized how our words could represent us. How the words that escape our mouths could give a wrong perception of our mind and our personality. I myself am guilty of using inappropriate language. I speak my mind without inhibitions that sometimes I offend people, though unintentionally. I never thought wrong of it, until someone misjudged me as being argumentative. Belligerent, even. I know I'm not those things and I don't wanna create that kind of impression. Well then I guess I have to take things down a notch or two. And I will.
- I realized that though I never cared about the pain I was inflicting on myself, I failed to take into consideration the pain I was inflicting on my parents. I've done/said things that I know have wounded them. Out of anger - for claiming to know what's good for me, for trying to manipulate me. Out of pain - in realizing that the house I grew up in is no longer my home, in seeing the family that I used to embrace so dearly break into a million little pieces, in losing the only thing that really mattered to me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you just because of the pain you've caused me, I know that's very immature of me. And since you've been very vocal about it, I'm also sorry for not being the kind of daughter you wish you had.
- I realized how much I've neglected You, my God. I used to talk to You like a friend in times of happiness and of sadness. We used to have a strong relationship. But then I started questioning Your existence. It became difficult for me to hold on to my blind faith when all my prayers seemed to have fallen on deaf ears. I thought I'm strong enough to coast through life without You. But I was wrong. Without You, I'm wretched, I'm lost and I'm weak. You know I was never a religious person. But I was a believer. A strong one, at that. And God, I want to believe again. Do You still have room for someone like me?
- I realized that my greatest mistake was to be constantly afraid that I will make a mistake. I have this fear of making the wrong choices that I tend to leave all my options open until none are left. I was given many chances before but I kept on screwing things up. I kept on trusting the wrong persons with my heart. I kept on putting my energy into things that never worked out. Many times, people got disappointed in the choices that I made. And every time, I felt a needling sense of failure. But life, I know, would always be full of so many choices that I would have to make. I need not worry about making the wrong choices because it's ok as it is normal. People might get disappointed again, but I'll just let them be. Choices would be made and I would readily deal with whatever the outcome might be.
And so I end this post with a beautiful poem. It's quite long but please take time to read it... ^_^
Please Listen!
(To What I'm Not Saying)
Don't be fooled by me.
Don't be fooled by the face I wear.
For I wear a mask, I wear a thousand masks.
Masks that I'm afraid to take off.
And none of them is me.
Pretending is an art that's second nature with me.
But don't be fooled, I beg you, don't be fooled.
I gave you the impression that I'm secure,
That all is sunny and unruffled with me.
Within, as well as without.
That confidence is my name,
And coolness my game.
That the water's calm and I'm in command,
And that I need no one.
But don't believe me. Please.
My surface may seem smooth,
But my surface is my mask.
Beneath lies no smugness, no complacence.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion,
In fear, in aloneness.
But I hide this.
I don't want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness,
And fear of being exposed.
That's why I frantically create a mask to hide behind.
A nonchalant, sophisticated façade.
To help me pretend,
To shield me from the glance that knows.
But such a glance is precisely my salvation,
My only salvation.
And I know it.
That is, if it's followed by acceptance.
If it's followed by love.
It's the only thing that can liberate me.
From myself,
From my own self-built prison walls,
From the barriers that I so painstakingly erect.
It's the only thing that will assure me
Of what I can't assure myself.
That I'm really worth something.
But I don't tell you this.
I don't dare.
I'm afraid to.
I'm afraid your glance will not be followed
By acceptance and love.
I'm afraid you'll think less of me.
That you'll laugh.
And your laugh will kill me
I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing,
That I'm just no good,
And that you'll see this and reject me.
So I play my game.
My desperate pretending game.
With a façade of assurance without,
And trembling child within.
And so begins the parade of masks,
And my life becomes a front.
I idly chatter to you,
In the suave tones of surface talk.
I tell you everything that's really nothing,
And nothing of what's everything,
Of what's crying within me.
So when I'm going through my routine,
Don't be fooled by what I'm saying.
Please listen carefully and try to hear
What I'm not saying,
What I'd like to be able to say,
What for survival I need to say,
But which I can't say.
I dislike hiding. Honestly.
I dislike the superficial game I'm playing.
The superficial, phony game.
I'd really like to be genuine,
And spontaneous,
And me.
But you've got to help me.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Seeing Red? Not.
It takes a lot for me to get mad. But when I do, I get really mad. And when I am, there's this nerve that runs from my brow to my forehead, which kinda stands out. I cry buckets of tears, I yell at the top of my lungs, I curse like hell, I break things and, sad to say, I also break hearts. Honestly, I don't like me when I'm mad. I scare me when I'm mad.
In my life, so far as I can remember, there had been two occasions that have unleashed the "evil" in me. I'm ashamed to admit that one of its hapless victims was my own dad. I could still remember in detail the things that sent me flying off the handle. I am aware that no amount of reasons, no matter how valid they all were, could justify what I did. And for that, I'm forever sorry. :(
I know exactly what you're trying to do. You're trying to provoke me. You want me to lose it. For what reason, I still don't know. But I'm sorry to tell you that you won't succeed. You can do and talk all the shit you want but you won't see me transform to Incredible Hulk. Coz as I've said, it takes A LOT. And I know where I stand. I have a choice and I choose not to react on your shit. I know a lot better than to get myself into trouble. You should know better too.
See, there is a thing called karma and I strongly believe that it can work its miracles. And when that day comes, I'm gonna sit back and enjoy the show.
In my life, so far as I can remember, there had been two occasions that have unleashed the "evil" in me. I'm ashamed to admit that one of its hapless victims was my own dad. I could still remember in detail the things that sent me flying off the handle. I am aware that no amount of reasons, no matter how valid they all were, could justify what I did. And for that, I'm forever sorry. :(
I know exactly what you're trying to do. You're trying to provoke me. You want me to lose it. For what reason, I still don't know. But I'm sorry to tell you that you won't succeed. You can do and talk all the shit you want but you won't see me transform to Incredible Hulk. Coz as I've said, it takes A LOT. And I know where I stand. I have a choice and I choose not to react on your shit. I know a lot better than to get myself into trouble. You should know better too.
See, there is a thing called karma and I strongly believe that it can work its miracles. And when that day comes, I'm gonna sit back and enjoy the show.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Bleeding Is Breathing
Eugene: "E masaya naman yan kapag nagkaka-pasa! Minsan nga naisip ko masokista yan si Kringle e!"
Me: "Naisip ko din..."
Am I trying to ease the pain in my heart by pains of the flesh? Has pain become an addiction?
God, save me from myself. Please.
Me: "Naisip ko din..."
Am I trying to ease the pain in my heart by pains of the flesh? Has pain become an addiction?
God, save me from myself. Please.
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Battered Better
Because we can't get enough of shooting each other with balls of paint...
The last time we played, I was already gasping for breath a few minutes after the first round began. Surprisingly now, I didn't find it difficult to run around the terrain. Guess the trek kinda strengthened my lungs. Sweet. ^_^ Though I improved on that aspect, I still suck at aiming and shooting and ducking for cover. So yeah, basically, I still suck at the game. Nyaha.
The bruises I got are helluva lot worse. I no longer took pictures of them coz I swear they're not a pretty sight. To say that they look horrible is an understatement. Believe me.
With pleasantly aching bodies and a bunch of stained clothes, we went to Filinvest clubhouse for our lunch courtesy of Boss Jay. I really had no plans of jumping into the pool with the sun beating down on me so I just enjoyed myself with the food, the drinks, and 123 pass.
The last time we played, I was already gasping for breath a few minutes after the first round began. Surprisingly now, I didn't find it difficult to run around the terrain. Guess the trek kinda strengthened my lungs. Sweet. ^_^ Though I improved on that aspect, I still suck at aiming and shooting and ducking for cover. So yeah, basically, I still suck at the game. Nyaha.
The bruises I got are helluva lot worse. I no longer took pictures of them coz I swear they're not a pretty sight. To say that they look horrible is an understatement. Believe me.
With pleasantly aching bodies and a bunch of stained clothes, we went to Filinvest clubhouse for our lunch courtesy of Boss Jay. I really had no plans of jumping into the pool with the sun beating down on me so I just enjoyed myself with the food, the drinks, and 123 pass.
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