Battered Fly

I am one of those who believe that butterflies may harbor human spirits. Seldom do I buy these things but experts have given a logical explanation as to why butterflies are susceptible to these unseen forces. So, why not?

Three days ago, I was planning to blog about this butterfly fluttering around my room but I ended up procrastinating. Hell, that's one of the things I do best. :) Nweiz, strange how I wake up every morning to find the butterfly near my bed like it's been there the whole night watching me sleep. Oftentimes it would alight near the computer and keep me company as I do all my keyboard-tapping and mouse-clicking during the wee hours of the morning when nobody's awake but me. Weird as it is but I felt secured during those three days.

As I write this entry, the butterfly is still here in my room. Only this time, it is not flying around like it used to. It's laying on my desk now, motionless, devoid of the beauty it once possessed. Apparently, the electric fan sucked it in and sliced its delicate form into two. *Sigh* Now who's gonna watch over me as I drift to dreamland? Who's gonna keep me company when sleep doesn't come easy? Some unseen ghost, maybe. Uhm, please go find yourself a butterfly first. I prefer it that way.

Same Shit, Different Day

From my phone conversation with Yel:
Yel: "Anong ginagawa mo?"
Me: "Madami. Manood ng TV, mag-internet..."

*Sigh* That made me think about the way I'm spending my leave. How I'm wasting my time doing nothing worthwhile. How I wake up at 11:30 in the morning and live the entire day as a couch or mouse potato. How I build ties with my friends from Capeside, Springfield, and Bikini Bottom. I do help my mom with some chores, though. But still. I am an official bum.

Yel: "E di aralin mo na yung ASP..."

It's easier said than done. But I'll probably take his advice. PROBABLY being the operative word used. ^_^

Meet my friends...

Nweiz, just finished watching Oprah with the cast of Sex and the City as her guest. I'm not really a fan of the series but I enjoyed watching a couple of episodes.

Oprah: "With whom do you want Carrie to end up with?"
Sarah: "I want Carrie to end up with contentment."

Very well said, my dear.

Argh!!! I can't take my greasy fingers off the remote control!!!

Questions For The Bored

Directions. Pick a band/artist then answer using only titles of their songs.



Are you male or female: Bitch Please II
Describe yourself: The Way I Am
How do some people feel about you: Who Knew
Describe your past love: Never Enough
Describe your lovelife: Nail in the Coffin
Describe what you want: Superman
Describe how you live: Just Don't Give A Fuck
Describe how you love: 'Till I Collapse / Infinite
A few words of wisdom: Just Lose It / Say What You Say

~oo0oo~

:: BUHAY KOOLASA ::
1. Anong paborito mong bilhin sa canteen?
>> Caramela para pde kainin sa loob ng classroom. Chaka yung lengua tapos bibili ako ng choki-choki tapos gagawin ko shang palaman! Sarap!

2. Na-guidance/principal's office ka na ba?
>> Grade 3 pa lang na-principal's office na ako. Dahil dito: "ang na ang na su la ki sun su mas ki dot mo ko mo ko". Sabi ni Vic Sotto yun sa isa niyang movie e hindi ko alam na mei bastos pala na meaning yun. Tapos madaming beses akong na-principal's office at guidance nung 4th year. Lagi kasing nadadamay sa mga kaguluhan sa classroom. Take note: damay lang ako! ^_^

3. Sinong favorite teachers mo?
>> Si Ms. Jet, Ms. Diola, at Ms. Chiaoco

4. Sino naman ang hatest mo?
>> Si Ms. Motas. Di ko talaga makalimutan nung pinabuhat nya samin ni Kitkat yung upuan namin papunta sa likod tapos pina-upo niya kme don na nakaharap sa bulletin board.

5. Favorite teacher's quotable quote?
>> Teacher Weng: "Eat my foot!"
>> Mrs. Cuanang: "Go home and plant kamote!"

6. San ka tumatambay?
>> Kung saan naka-pwesto ang kada sa canteen, yun na din yung tambayan namin.

7. Most unforgettable experience?
>> Uhm, madami pa talaga akong naaalalang experience e. Hmm, isa siguro ung naging habit namin ni Jong na pagpunta sa chapel tuwing umaga tapos minsan kahit tapos na kami magdasal, nandon lang kme tinitignan kung pano magdasal ung iba. Tapos ung mga trip sa CR. Bsta, madami.

8. Varsity?
>> Wala. Ang natirang varsity sa school e volleyball lang. Puro pasa lang sa braso ang inaabot ko don e.

9. Sinong una mong nakilala sa highschool mo?
>> New person na wala sa gradeschool? Si Abby!!

10. Sinong mga unang barkada mo?
>> Ang naaalala ko na lang nung grade6. Sina Monica, Cristal, Natnat at Kristine. Aba'y akalain mo... si Roxie din pala! Hehe! Shempre pa!

11. Sinong mga kabarkada mo nung grumaduate ka ng HS?
>> Sina Jong, Jonah, Noemi, Abby, Alpha. Aba'y akalain mo ulit... si Roxie!

12. Sinong mga kabarkada mo from HS hanggang ngayon?
>> Silang lahat pa rin kabarkada ko. Si Roxie counted ulit sa college kada. Aba'y...

13. Nami-miss mo na ba uniform mo?
>> Minsan kapag hirap mag-decide kung anong isusuot sa school. Ginawa na nga naming costume nina Roxie at Aika sa defense namin sa RDBMS e. Hehe!

14. Most unforgettable person? Bakit?
>> Hindi kasama yung kada ko.. si Bianca siguro. Andami ko kasing naranasan nung nagkakilala kami. Doon ko naranasan na may mga parinig at vandals laban sakin. Keso ang kapal daw ng mukha ko para saktan yung kaibigan nila... at kung anu-ano pang kadramahan sa buhay. Pero buti naman e ok na kami ngayon. Natatawa na lang ako kapag naaalala ko.

15. I-describe ang mukha sa grad pic.
>> Don sa grad pic na provided ng school, lahat kami mga mukhang galing sa Mt. Pinatubo. Dahil ata sa make-up, mga boplaks kasi yung kinuha nila. Shempre pinalitan ko yun ng maganda! Hehe! Kamukha ko naman. Hindi mukhang galing Mt. Pinatubo.

16. Anong binibili mo sa labas tuwing uwian?
>> Bawal naman ang vendors sa labas e. Minsan lang McFlurry sa McDo S'mall.

17. Sino huling nakita mo sa batch?
>> Di kasama ung mga Mapuans... si Agnes sa LRT.

18. Sinong maganda sa batch nio?
>> Naku! Madaming maganda sa batch namin! Hehe!

19. Anong contest ang napanalunan mo?
>> As in ako lang? Wala. Kung buong klase madami, mga best in bulletin board at mga choral fest, dance interpretation ek-ek.

20. Anong masasabi mo sa sportsfest?
>> Nung first year mas maganda kasi by batch. Mas masaya itaguyod ang bandila ng buong batch. Kaso simula 2nd year.. naging by color. Halo-halo na lahat ng batch. Ok din naman pero mas masaya talaga kapag by batch.

21. Anong masasabi mo sa lovelife ng mga koolasa?
>> Uhm, siguro sa mga tao na hindi naranasan kung paano maging koolasa, mahihirapan silang intindihin na normal lang sa mga koolasa na magkaron ng crush na babae kahit hindi ka tibo. Pero yun nga, accdg. to Ms. Em, stage lang yun. Pagka-graduate ng St.Scho, graduate na din sa mga g2g relationships. Yun ang dapat!

22. Sino mga crush mo?
>> Sina Cherub, Inseng, at Carol! Wahaha!! Shempre nung HS pa yon... ;)

23. Ilan ang nanligaw sayo?
>> 5

24. May sinagot ka ba?
>> Promise ko kasi sa sarili ko na g-graduate ako ng St.Scho na hindi ako papasok sa isang g2g relationship. Tinupad ko yon.

25. O baka ikaw ang nanligaw?
>> Hindi ah!

26. Sino sa batch nio ang dapat na sumali sa SCQ?
>> Haha! Si Jaja at si Yang! Mga talentado e!

27. Ano mga naging sections mo?
>> St. Agnes, St. Martha, St. Lioba, St. Veronica

28. Anong club ang sinalihan mo?
>> ODESCI! Organization for the Development of Environmental and Scientific Interest

29. May silbi ka ba sa club niyo?
>> Shempre! Nung 3rd year ako yung secretary tapos nung 4th year naman treasurer. Taga-gawa din ako ng letterings sa bulletin board at taga-gawa at print ng certificates sa Cleanliness Drive! Mahilig din akong utusan ni Ms. Chiaoco at asar-asarin sa lovelife.

30. Sinong nami-miss mo?
>> Yung HS kada ko at ang buong Veronica.

Rain On Me

"Reality hits you when you least expect it." It hit me when I was at my most vulnerable.

Just finished talking to two of my friends over the phone. After so many months of suffering in silence, I was able to talk about all the anger and pain bottled up inside me. The tough girl facade is no longer up. The numbness began to wear off and I'm feeling it all now. I'm feeling it all.

I knew it right from the start. I knew that something's going on between them but I tried to brush it off. I blinded myself from the truth. I forced myself to believe that they won't do anything that will hurt me. They won't do anything that will crush me. Coz she's my friend. And friends don't do that to each other. But I was wrong. I was stabbed in the back and minced down to microscopic bits by the very person whom I trusted. And it fuckin' hurts.

To the girl:
I came across one of your letters way back in 2002. You said something about taking good care of true friendships coz they are rare and hard to find. Well, that's true. Sadly though, I wasn't able to find one in you. You also said your wishes for us and that you'll be happy to see us together. Bullshit. I can smell the burning sarcasm. Uhm, here's a glass of water to help you swallow your words.

To the guy:
You broke me in. In so many ways, you broke me in. How dare you feed me with all your bullshit about leaving due to family problems? How dare you talk about hating liars when you are a liar yourself? It was only last August that you gave me the true reason. If it wasn't for that email I've sent you, you could've deprived me of the explanation I deserved. How dare you do this to me? I swear to God, I loved you in the plainest meaning of these words that trying to define it is beyond me. When my parents and my lola judged you, I defended you. I forced you to drop by our house to prove them wrong. But I guess it turned out to be the other way around. They proved me wrong.

This realization extinguished the love that used to burn in my heart. I'm still hoping, for the longest time, that they will have the guts to talk to me about it, to tell everything straight to my face. Though I know that dissecting them and hearing the truth from their mouths will only torment me, I'm ready for that. I need that hammer to hit my head. What they did hurts. But trying to hide the truth from me hurts all the more.

This is final. I'm taking a leave from school. Not only due to financial reasons but I now have my personal reasons as well.

God, why does it always have to rain on me?

"Even though I know
I don’t wanna know
Yeah I guess I know
I just hate how it sounds"
--- One Thing, Finger Eleven

The Dreamer

My lolo died 2 years ago. Months before his death, I had a dream. I was at the living room while my lolo was seated at the dining area. He stood, walked a little, and then he dropped dead. I woke up crying. I never bothered to share this dream to anyone. I don't want to freak them out. Months after, my lolo died of cardiac arrest while taking his breakfast at their dining table.

Three nights ago, I had another dream. I was seated on the floor with my uncle while my lola was seated on the sofa. Beside her was my lolo. I was the only one who can see his ghost but we were all aware of his presence. He was asking me a lot of questions. That's it. No deaths involved. I dunno what it meant. So when my lola's blood pressure went up that she almost lost her consciousness, I totally freaked out. Another death in the family would be too much for me to handle. When I think about it, the dream could be my lolo's way of telling me that he'll be taking my lola with him soon. Or it could also mean that there's no need for us to worry too much coz he's always watching over her. I hope it's the latter. I wanna believe it's the latter.

Twenty Oh! Five

We normally celebrate the New Year at The Fort. But this year, no matter how much we want to, the situation dictates otherwise. We can't just leave Lola at home and celebrate someplace else. I just hate Smart for hosting the concert at The Fort this year. Sana last year na lang. Sayang.

Well, it's 2005 now. Everyone's a year older, and they're getting older still! This is my last year as a teenager. Now there's a scary thought. Nweiz, a happy brand-spanking new year to all!

Remembering 2004

The last few months of 2004 have been depressing for my family. Due to uncontrollable events, we've been struggling financially. My lola was confined in the hospital twice. Right now, she's undergoing two different therapies. She's also taking a lot of medications amounting to a thousand pesos. Weekly? No siree. It's daily. That, plus the different household bills, daily expenses, my tuition fee (which is still unsettled), my brothers' tuition fees, and other payables? Talk about scraping the bottom of the barrel. Being the *ehem* responsible first born, my concerns suddenly started to be about the moolah. When will papa pay for the tuition? When can we go to the grocery coz I'm sick of corned beef? Are we gonna have our cable disconnected? What about our phone line?

It ain't that bad, though. I mean, we still have a house that we own and don't need to pay for, we have a car, we still enjoy our cable connection, and they all have their mobile phones. Well, all except for me. But I'm fine with that. What the devil has taken, God will replace in His own time. Oh well. It's not like we're destitute and I really hope we never be. However, I can't help but worry.

Nweiz, a few hours to go and it's a new year for all of us. I hope it will be better than the last one.

Maybe So, Maybe Not

A lot of psychics have begun offering their predictions for the year 2005. They say that "there will be three coup attempts," "our economy wouldn't be any better", "the year of the rooster would mean isang-kahig-isang-tuka" and other such ominous sayings. I find this whole business of prediction weird. I believe that the future is what we make of it, regardless of cosmic invisible hands, which may or may not change our fate. I think it's about time for people to become less fatalistic and to assume more responsibility for their actions.

Rest In Peace

My Aunt just died of breast cancer. After 5 years of fighting it, her body finally gave in. It's a painful death for all of us. How cruel of Him to take Tita away in this time of the year. But I know she's happy now. She's now in a place free from pain and sufferings - a better place... with Him.

Tita, thank you for taking good care of us. Thank you for calling just to check if we're ok. Thank you for the memories, which will be forever etched in my mind. We'll never forget you. May you find peace.

Goodbye.

You've Got Mail

I miss receiving mails. And I don't mean mail as in email coz I receive an awful lot of email everyday. Often those which have been forwarded so many times that the forwarded-to lists are longer than the messages themselves. Heck, I don't even read them. They should all just expect an instant trip to my garbage bin.

Nweiz, I'm talking about mail as in snail mail. Yep. I miss receiving those. The last time I received one was way back in 2nd year highschool. 'Twas from a friend who migrated to US. Now, it seems like the only snail mail I get is my magazine subscription. Oh well. I would love to receive mail. And send mail too. The kind where I have to lick a stamp and stick it on an envelope and write an address other than cuteako@yahoo.com. La lang. I guess this is just one of the simple things that make me happy.

Wanna make me happy? Snail mail me.

Happy Birthday Jesus

Went out to visit some of our relatives today. 'Twas fun. But I'm no longer a kid so I'm exempted from receiving aguinaldo. Or should I say, aquino.

Tito Beng's condo was, as usual, a major jawdropper. He even hired an interior designer to do the decorations. He spent like 50k just to have that Christmas feel in his condo. A spendthrift, indeed. Tito Bert and Tita Epi celebrated their silver wedding anniversary. Ate Shirley brought the video coverage of their wedding. Funny how their video looked like an episode from Misadventures of Maverick and Ariel. No shit!

Dino headed to Eastwood for his kada's christmas party. I think it's his 3rd christmas party already. Just a thought. I'm not that religious, but I find it kinda disturbing that most of us seem to forget that we are celebrating a birthday party today. And it's not just anyone's birthday, it's Jesus Christ's. We seem to be forgetting that in these materialistic times. I bet He ain't happy having His birthday being used as some excuse for partying excess. Here's a little question: Isn't He invited to His own party?!

Oh well. Merry christmas everyone! Happy birthday Jesus!

Whattametalmouth

Today is the day that I chose to live.

Yep! My third attempt to present the project went just fine. Thank you Lord. With my CPU and my good ol' keyboard with me, nothing could possibly go wrong. Hehe! :)

I arrived at around 9:45am. Went to the faculty room to look for Ma'am Moja but she wasn't around. Checked out the laboratories but she wasn't there either. I waited 'til 10. Then, I waited some more. 'Twas already 10:30. I told my dad that I doubt if my professor will arrive. Being late is not in her vocabulary. My dad told me that she'll ask Fel (dean's secretary) for the contact number of my professor. Good thing he knows her personally. Let the connections work! :) I thought to myself, "Ma'am, you are messing with the wrong student." *evil grin* My dad told me that Fel texted Ma'am Moja. According to her reply, she'll arrive at around 12pm. Balak ata talaga akong injanin non e.

Nweiz, she did arrive before 12. She was smiling and all. What's up with that? "Hell, whattametalmouth!", I thought. She told me to bring my CPU at the faculty room. After I've proven that the program is indeed working...

Me: "Ayan po, nagw-work naman talaga diba?"
Ma'am Moja: "Oo na. Pano ba yan?"
Me: "2-Player game sha. Tig-isa kayo ng shift key. Tapos pabilisin lang makapunta don sa finish line, yung color blue. Yung pindot sa shift, paulit-ulit dapat."
Ma'am Moja: "Palaro nga. Haha! Pampasira ata 'to ng keyboard e!"
Me: "Napaka-challenging nga e! Ayun, ok naman. Ano ma'am ok na po ba ako?"
Ma'am Moja: "Hocge, congratulations! Pasado ka na!"

Yipee!!! I passed! Excuse me, I neglected to use my all-powerful caps lock key. I meant to say, I PASSED! I've been praying really hard for this since Wednesday. Thank you Lord for answering my prayers. I remember just last night, when I was starting to lose hope, I prayed the most difficult prayer - "Thy will be done". I kept on repeating it until I fell asleep. I dunno. It's just that I no longer wanna do things my way. I wanna just let go and leave everything in His hands. If failing one of my subjects is part of His plan, if He wanted to teach me a lesson, if this will make me a better person, then so be it. Thy will be done. But I guess, it ain't part of His plan afterall. GOD, THANK YOU.

Now, I'm starting to feel the spirit of Christmas. I can now feel the nip of cold air bite through my skin. ^_^

One Last Chance

Today is the day that I chose to die.

Argh!!! Sure, I brought my CPU with me and I did arrive at the school on time. The problem was, the keyboards in school were not compatible with my CPU. And no, I did not bring my good ol' keyboard with me. HOLY FUCKIN' SHIT. Can you say stupid?! There was one keyboard found at the library though. But no matter what I say or do, rules are rules and they had no plans of breaking any. No CPU, monitor, keyboard or mouse can be brought out of the library. RUCK FULES.

Going home to get mine will also be pointless. According to Rupa, the MRT broke down. There's no way I'm going to be back at school by 12 if I travel by land. I asked my dad to go to the condo of Tito Beng to borrow his keyboard. Unfortunately, he wasn't there. Tough luck.

When the clock striked 12, Ma'am Moja headed out. Fast. I begged for a last chance but she simply ignored me. Biatch! My time is up, and I blew it. My dad approached Ma'am Moja and explained to her the problem I encountered, blahblahblah. He did kiss her ass too! Funny how he told her how young she looks and how he thought that she was just one of my classmates. I dunno if that was a good thing or not. But hell, it worked! Ma'am Moja allowed me to present it again tomorrow, same time. Abusado ako noh? Sobra!

Yes. I'm desperate. I am so not failing my laboratory class. And I want my Christmas to be happy. Now I'm hoping against hope that she didn't just do that to shut me up. I'm crossing my fingers for that.

Second Chance

*Sigh* The program I'm supposed to defend didn't run properly at the laboratory. At first, Ma'am Moja told me that I'll pass the course despite my failure to present the project. But earlier this evening, she told me the words that will haunt me for the rest of my college days: "Ay, mali pala yung computation ko sayo kanina. Bagsak ka pala sa lab." ...I was taken aback. I couldn't even muster a reply. To say "heaven came crashing down on me" is an understatement. It was worse than that.

When I finally regained my strength...

Me: "Ma'am, gumagana naman 'to sa bahay e. Dito lang talaga mei error kahit dalhin ko na lang yung PC ko tomorrow."
Ma'am Moja: "Hindi pwede. Ngayon ang deadline niyan. E ba't yung sa iba ok naman?"
Me: "Di ko din po alam. Ma'am, cge na po. Hindi ko talaga 'to pwede ibagsak. Ginagawa ko naman lahat e. Cge na po, payag na po kayo bukas. Promise, gumagana talaga 'to."

Our conversation went on and on like a broken record. I continuously pleaded for another chance, while she remained firm with her decision. After an hour of "pangungulit" and a lot of ass-kissing, she finally gave in. She gave me until 10:00am tomorrow to present the project. Thank God. Now I have to make sure that the program really does work on my CPU. The clock is ticking and I'm feeling the pressure.

Jawdropper

Today's the first day of my finals. I only need to get through my SOCSCI513 exam and my CSWALP011L defense tomorrow then I'll be footlose and stress-free for the rest of the month. Freedom, I can almost smell thee. :)

Nweiz, my uncle bought a new desktop PC. A 3 Ghz, with 512 MB DDRAM, 160 GB disk space, 128 MB Video Memory, complete with a DVD/CD writer, a 9-in-1 digital media drive, and a TV-port, HP Pavilion T698d.

Excuse me while I pick my jaw off the floor.

I'm really happy that my lola and my uncle are now living here with us. Not just because of the gadgets and the PC, of course. :)

OTI - Techweek 2004

Last Thursday, we started our organization's event called OTI-Techweek 2004. It's a 3-day event of seminars, workshops, exhibits, contests, etc. I was the OIC in one of the seminars, which made the past few days so fucked-up. I'm not in the mood to write so I won't be elaborating on it. Ma'am Christie, read this: Actions driven by guilt are rendered half-hearted. True, ain't it?

Generally speaking, the Techweek was a success. We managed to pull everything off despite the problems, pressures, stress, and everything in between. Kudos to everyone!

Habitat For Humanity

Our organization volunteered to help construct houses in one of the communities being established by Habitat for Humanity in Las Piñas City. I woke up at around 4:30 in the morning. I'm one scaredy cat so I opened the TV but the first thing that I saw on the screen was a white lady!!! Yikes!!! I immediately turned the TV off and ran back to bed! It awakened every sleepy bone in my body! Now THAT is a whole lot better than coffee.

Nweiz, Roxie and I reached our meeting place 5 minutes late. Not bad, eh? I think we left school 45 minutes later. Filipino time nga naman. Oh well. Almost half of the applicants attended. Our adviser, Ma'am Nenita, was also with us. She slept most of the time, though. Ehe. But that's just fine. At least, she was there! Unlike Sir Jayson who's just a bunch of brawns and... more brawns.

After Engineer-whose-name-I've-forgotten oriented us with what we had to do, 'twas up to us to divide the work among ourselves. Our players removed the wood from the first few houses and transfered it to the next, the guys shoveled gravel and sand, while the girls strained the sand used for the bricks. The toughest that we did was when we carried hollow blocks and buckets of cement. Now my arms and upper back hurt like hell. I feel like a ninety-year-old. Heck. I'm all exhausted but I definitely enjoyed it. ^_^

Another One Ties The Knot

I dunno why I find it so difficult to decide on how to begin with this entry. I'm a little short with words. Oh well. I guess I'll just start with this:

Kuya Neil: "I, Neil Mendoza, do take Shirley Santos as my lawful wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."
Ate Shirley: "I, Shirley Santos, do take Neil Mendoza as my lawful wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."

Aww. It has always been my favorite part of weddings - the exchange of vows. I admire people who can utter words of commitment. I admire people who are ready to face forever. I may be wrong, but I guess most of us are ready to face love but are not ready to face forever. Coz forever is such a scary thought. There is always this fear of marrying the wrong person. And I'm happy for my cousin coz she was able to conquer that fear. Just a thought: How am I to know if he's "the one"? What if he's just pretending to be "the one"?

Nweiz, saw this on the net. I'm posting it for future use. Hehe! ^_^

???: "Kringle, I give you this rose. Because it grew from a tiny seed, becoming stronger and larger until it burst into flower, it symbolizes the way my love for you has grown. Each year on our wedding anniversary, I will give you another rose. In so doing, I'll remember this day and renew the vows we've made."
Me: "???, I give to you this vase of water. Because water is the one element without which we would perish, it symbolizes the importance of your love in my life. Each year on our anniversary, I will refill this vase, offering it to you as a symbol of my ever renewing love."
???: "Without water, the rose would die."
Me: "Without the rose, the vase of water would not be beautiful."
???: "My gift is enhanced by yours, just as my life is enhanced by you."
Me: "My gift is lovely because of yours, just as my life is better because of you."

Hmm, sweet.

Collecionez

Just arrived home from G4. I'm supposed to buy a pair of silver sandals for tomorrow's wedding but I emerged out of the mall empty handed. I'm not really that choosy. I guess there's just too many to choose from. Oh well. I'm off to the mall again tomorrow morning. Let the quest continue...

FUCKFUCKFUCK. I almost flew off the handle when I saw my Matrix Reloaded OST on the floor with the CD scratched. The culprit: one of my brothers. How many times do I have to tell them to handle my CDs with care? Is that too much to ask?! I screamed at their faces until I saw beads of blood oozing out of their ears. I kicked them soo hard, it made their heads spin. Punched them even harder, they spitted blood and teeth. What an atrocity. But nah. None of that happened. Since no one would take the blame anyway, doing all that would be an awful waste of time and energy. So there. I just closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and asked God to take the anger away. And I thank Him for doing that. It ain't easy. But it sure is better than causing harm to my brothers. Hmm... I think it should be my new mantra.

I just wanna say that I value my audio and video CD collection so much that it has become a part of me. So when I lend you a CD, I'm entrusting you a part of me, expecting you to return it in good condition, in one piece. When you break it, you break a part of me. When you lose it, I lose a part of me as well.

Speaking of CDs, I'm currently listening to Sugarfree's latest album "Dramachine". Love their music! I think it's funny how their music is sweet but... sugar free! I urge people to support the local music industry! Please buy original pinoy albums that deserve recognition.

"Kung kelan pa nawalan ng ilaw
Saka pa lahat naging malinaw
Baka ako ang may kasalanan
Kung bakit tayo may tampuhang
Hindi na pwedeng pag-usapan"
--- Kandila, Sugarfree

My Gulay

Last Sunday (Oct 31), my Lola was discharged from the hospital. She stayed here with my uncle. We were all glad that she was able to recover pretty fast. But little did we know that the gladness that we felt was short-lived. She had her 2nd mild stroke last Saturday (Nov 6). I went to the hospital to visit my Lola this morning. It absolutely breaks my heart to see her in that condition. I felt like crying. But I didn't. I wanted to be strong... for her.

Sir Basco kept on bugging me about my mistake. I felt like digging my own grave. It turned out that the reservation I made for the CPU and LCD wasn't confirmed so all of his classes weren't able to use it. Hell, I asked the librarian if we already have the slot and she said yes! Why is there a need to confirm it the next day?! My gulay.