I called off my interview at Antico Manila this morning. Had a change of heart because of the YM conversation I had with Mike last night. But I still pushed through with my interview at Tsukiden. Ms. Melody told me to prepare for the panel interview any time next week coz they might ask me some technical questions.
Ugh. The more I take these technical exams and interviews in programming, the more I realize that I'm really not cut out for it.
No, I don't see myself as a hardcore programmer 5 years from now. No, I don't want to lead a group of design engineer trainees in the future. And there's nothing, NOTHING, to love about programming.
Sure, I can program. But it's not what I wanna do. It's not what I wanna be. I don't wanna get a job just for the sake of having a job, of earning some moolah. I don't wanna dread waking up on a Monday morning. I don't wanna drag myself to work everyday. I may sound too idealistic, and unrealistic, and impractical, and naive. Maybe it's because I am.
I want a job that I love!!!
Whatever happened to this??? And this???
I already know which way to go. I already know what my dream is. I already know where my passion is. But why the hell am I not pursuing it?!
Fucking shoot me!
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